'Till I'm Found

Here I’m calm and at peace

I hear the rain drops hit the trees

Then they plop and bounce off the ground,

I think I’ll hide here ‘till I’m found

We four strangers remain still and quiet

Enjoying, on our own, nature’s riot

Others hustle and run around,

But I think I’ll hide here, ‘till I’m found

I know you’re out there in a crowd,

Having fun and being loud

But I sit here and don’t make a sound

Yet, I think I’ll hide here, ‘till I’m found.

The rain picks up; it starts to pour,

You take her home, a “hot score”

I see you go and feel my heart pound,

Still, I think I’ll hide here, ‘till I’m found.

I hear your voice, yet you seem so distant.

Wish I could forget, just for an instant,

For I feel as though my heart has drowned,

So I think I’ll hide here, ‘till I’m found.

You stole it from me, my love for rain,

Now the only thing I feel is pain

What was a smile is now a frown,

Yeah, I think I’ll hide here, ‘till I’m found

But then you run and hold me in your embrace

I forget everything: time and space,

For I feel this was meant to be.

Thank you, you finally found me.

Then I awake from this tempting dream

With a pain so strong I could almost scream.

It’s been years now since you’ve been around,

Years that I’ve been waiting, never to be found…

I Want to be in Love

I want to be in love

I want to gaze into another’s eyes and know exactly what they are thinking

To see a look in those eyes as if I am the only one who matters to them.

I want to find someone and then be unable to imagine life without them

Have them tell me I am the only one for them, that I complete them and feel the same way too.

I want someone who I can say I will go to the end of the world for

Who could easily crush my entire world in a matter of moments with just a few words,

But won’t.

Because we are in love.

I want to be inspired to write songs.

I want to write cheesy love songs that are timeless and people get sick of hearing,

But love them all the same because they were written at the peak of love

And express exactly how they want to feel for another.

A feeling that not even words can express

A feeling that one only knows once they have felt it,

And forget its true feeling once it’s gone

So they need to be reminded by songs and poetry

By our songs.

I want to have inside jokes

Jokes that only we know, and only we can truly laugh at

Jokes that others couldn’t understand even if we explained

But they will join in the laughter because they want to be a part of it too

Because they want to feel our happiness and share our moments with us

Because they seem to be the happiest moments

Because we seem to be the happiest two people around

Laughing at our jokes

I want to be skinny.

I want not another calorie to ever pass these lips again

I want to work out for hours and hours until I feel as though I can go on no more,

And then continue on

I want it so bad I will throw up after my parents make me eat

I will become angry at them; yell at them, when they don’t understand

When they worry.

Because they say I’m beautiful no matter what,

Even when I feel hideous.

Disgusting.

Because there is no way to hide my hips or stomach without pinching, or hurting

Because I don’t look like those girls on the T.V. or in the magazines

And I am conditioned to think they are how all girls are supposed to look.

And I just want to feel sexy once in a while.

But how can I when I can’t fit into those cute jeans or that top

When I’m a size 8 instead of a size 2.

I want to be beautiful

I want to have flawless skin and perfect hair.

To have mothers hope their daughters will look like me and the little girls to hope so as well

I want other girls to be jealous of my beauty, envious; yearn to look like me,

Wonder why they can’t look more like me

And boys to drool over it

Dream about me at night, then be ashamed when they see me

Have them all speechless when I approach them, nervous to be around me

I want all the boys to want me, but I only want one

I want to be compared to actresses, super models, singers, and goddesses

Told by others that I am the most beautiful girl they have ever seen

I want to be young forever

I want to party every night, all night with friends

And wake up in the morning and not remember parts of last night

But that will be OK because I have no where I need to be

No responsibilities, no obligations

I want to dance

Dance with friends, dance with strangers, dance with anyone who wants to dance

Because on a dance floor, we are all friends, we are all family

We are all there for the same purpose

To be free of everything and forget who we are for a while

And we can be whoever we want to be

But most importantly

Above everything else I want to be,

Something I am willing to give up everything else for

For this is the most important thing of all

And the one probably most forgotten

And often least desired

I want to be me.

What If

What if all you had to do was say one word
And that one word could change the world
But no one would know it was you who said it
Would you say the word?
Or wait for someone else to do it for you?

What if you could meet someone new
Someone who was exactly like you
But you didn't like them and what they do
Would you change who you were?
Or wait for people to become accustomed to you?

What if you could save a life
And all you had to do was give a breath
But the one breath would shorten your life
Would you give that breath?
Or wait until there is nothing you can do?

The world is full of what ifs and maybes
The world is yours to do with what you please
What will you do?
If given the chance, will you do the right thing?
Even if the only one who knew was you?
Only you can ever know what kind of person you are
And the things you do, when no one else can see
What kind of person will you be?

Dear Stranger

Dear Stranger,

I long to see your eyes, open them up to me

Not to see your soul,

Not to see your past,

And not to see your secrets

But to see me in them, how you see me

All else can be forgotten

All else can be forgiven, as long as I can see me in them

Dear Stranger,

Please, I just want to hear your voice

What does it sound like?

Perhaps a child’s lullaby

Maintained only in a distant memory, calling to me

Longing to be heard each night,

But each night growing fainter,

Now only a whisper in my most distant of dreams

Dear Stranger,

I want to know you

Know you more than just the photograph

Worn down by tiny fingers, tracing the replication of you

Trying to get to know you

To memorize each and every bit of you

Only to slowly be forgotten, as those tiny fingers grew,

Becoming a blurry image behind preoccupied eyes

Yet the photograph still has not collected dust

For it was not entirely forgotten

Dear Stranger,

Let me see you smile, a real, happy smile

The smile you give a friend, who was never truly forgotten

Merely misplaced in time

But time has also brought them back to you

Giving you a chance to get to know each other once more

A smile that could never, truly, be captured in a photo

Or even in a memory, no matter how strong

One that must be experienced

Dear Stranger,

I want to see your lips form my name once more

Perhaps followed by a smile?

And then maybe the words “It’s good to see you”

Or even “I’m proud of you”

But not “Wow, you’ve grown up”

Because you don’t know how I’ve grown up or how fast

You don’t know what I’ve had to do, or how I’ve done it

You’ve missed that part of me,

Dear Stranger,

Please don’t make me hear you say you’ve missed me,

Because I already know that

You’ve missed me, you’ve missed my childhood

But we both already know that

And never tell me you’re sorry

Those words I never want to see formed on your lips

I never want to hear them in your voice, or see them in your eyes

Because those are just Band-Aid words,

They never fix a problem, never heal a wound,

They have no meaning to me now

And if anything, your absence has made me stronger

Dear Stranger,

What can I call you but stranger?

Should I call you sir?

Maybe William or Bill?

Because I am not sure I can still call you dad

Perhaps, one day, I will call to you, once again

Perhaps, one day, you will finally answer

Dear Stranger,

I long to see your eyes, open them up to me

And if I no longer see me in them,

You can close them again to me

And this time, you can keep them closed forever

And you will forever be a stranger.

I Hope You Realize

When you walk down the street,

Enveloped in the blanket of night,

And you look up to the black sky,

To see the thousands of stars,

Shining so bright,

I hope you realize,

They’re shining for you.

When you awake before dawn,

Before the sun begins its slow rise,

Across the vast and empty sky,

Breaking through the dark,

To bring us light,

I hope you realize,

It’s rising for you.

When you lay next to me,

Holding me tight in your arms,

As if to never let me go,

And you feel my heart beating

In tandem with yours

I hope you realize,

It’s beating for you.